What does 'I Miss You' mean?

My son asked me this out of nowhere. And I froze. Blank. Staring at the wall like it had all the answers.

It was such a simple question. But it hit me like a ton of bricks in my head. I wasn’t prepared, not for the question, and definitely not for the storm it stirred inside me.

He wasn’t asking for some poetry from his "Writer-Dad." He just wanted a meaning. A definition. But my brain started spinning, flashing through years, people, memories, ghosts. People I’ve lost. Moments that slipped away. The version of me I don’t recognize anymore.

I wanted to dodge. Give him something stupid like, “It means you like someone a lot.” But then I thought, if I mess this up, this kid will grow up giving stupid answers to real questions. And that’s not what I want him to remember about his father.

So I paused. Let the silence sit heavy between us. Then I looked him in the eye and said - "It means… you had something, or someone. And now you don’t. And now you want it back badly. That’s missing."

He blinked. Probably didn’t understand a word. But something in his face softened. And then I realized. He didn’t really want the answer. He just wanted me. I had just come home from work. He knew I wouldn’t play cars or play with building blocks. So he reached for something else we could do together. He chose to talk.

That was his way in. And in that moment, I saw not just a child, but a little soul who’d figured out love in its purest, most heartbreaking form.

He didn’t just get my time that evening. He got my awe. My respect. And a deeper kind of love I didn’t know I had left in me.

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